Doing my job - as a dad
Someone called Liam names (not that he know what names he was called). It really upset him, he's a very sensitive guy. Initially there was some crying and then I thought he was over it. The kids go to bed and I went upstairs to work while watching some Weezer concert footage.
About a half hour later, Liam shows up crying. Says he "hurt myself's feelings" by dwelling on memories of the way some people have treated him. We talked for 10-15 minutes. At one point, I told Liam that "you're one of my favorite people in the whole world" and I could see he hadn't thought of that. I could tell believed me. I got to tell him that he was a "good kid" no matter what mistakes he may make. We talked about some good things to dwell on when you are sad, watched a couple Weezer songs and I took him downstairs to go to bed. Before putting him to bed, I gave him a big hug and told him sometimes even the things I suggested might not make him feel all the way better. I told him that when that happens he should say a prayer and ask his mom or dad for a hug and we'd do what we could.
As I went to turn out the light, he said "Dad, you should feel good about what you did tonight." I felt great, to have been able to communicate my deep and unconditional love of my son and to feel that he understood in some way, was not good - it was amazing.
As I went to turn out the light, he said "Dad, you should feel good about what you did tonight." I felt great, to have been able to communicate my deep and unconditional love of my son and to feel that he understood in some way, was not good - it was amazing.
But -
What if I had said "Stop your crying and go to bed"? When would this opportunity have next presented itself?
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